Jila Shateri Mokhtari

Analogue photography, double exposure – 40*60 cm
The playful screams of the children, chas- ing each other, wakes me up. I don’t know for how long I’ve been sleeping. It must be day, I wonder; otherwise so many children in the playground wouldn’t make sense. I hide my face in my palms and I find my eyelids sore. It feels painful touching them. I hear a little girl scream- ing: “Mira! Estoy aqui. “* And that’s when the reality slaps me! Suddenly I remember everything and the reason to my sore eyes. Damn it! Consciousness! Nasty consciousness!I try to keep my eyes closed but the little girl doesn’t seem to let it go. She screams: Aquiiiiiiii * I try not to hear her, covering my ears with a pillow. She says: But that’s cheating. It’s not how you’re supposed to play. I know she’s right. I know I’m cheating and I’m sick and tired of all this.All of a sudden I loosen up and the pillow falls. I open my eyes looking at the ceiling, nothing is new: the cracks are as always. I see your face in the ceiling, in the cracks. I Miss you, I terribly miss you, and the clothesline in the roof and the smoky view of the neighbor- hood from up there. *Look I’m here (Spanish) **Here! (Spanish)